Achieving Digital Wellness in Your Family:
The Five Most Important Steps
Download and print here.
Step 1: Create a Family Media Plan
Step 2: Set up Bedrooms as Sanctuaries
Step 3: Establish Device-free Family Times
Step 4: Regularly Talk about Technology as a Family
Step 5: Check Children’s Devices Consistently
Step 1: Create a Family Media Plan
As a family, create a Family Media Plan. Please see our website for guidance. This plan will be:
Based on your family values, which you can define using this worksheet
Grounded in American Academy of Pediatrics expertise
Helpful in navigating decisions and consequences about device use
<> Complete Family Media Plan
Step 2: Set up Bedrooms as Device-free (or -limited) Sanctuaries
Establish bedrooms as a space to disconnect provides important benefits:
How do I work with my child to create a device-free sanctuary? With so much online homework, it’s hard to keep bedrooms device-free. Talk about it with your child and brainstorm ideas. With kids in elementary and middle school, collect laptops and tablets as soon as schoolwork is complete. For high schoolers, establish a place to stow devices used for school as soon as school is done. Fill rooms with off-screen activities, like books, journals, and maybe a yoga mat. Follow your child’s lead.
Creates a place for kids, tweens and teens to disconnect and escape the pressures of the online world AND turn to relaxing, restorative offline activities
Keeps kids safer by limiting unsupervised internet and social media use
Protects and preserves healthy sleep habits
Arrange for kids to do online/screen-based homework first so as it gets closer to bedtime, the remaining homework does not require a screen, which interferes with quality and quantity of sleep
Collect all devices an hour or more before bedtime
<> Establish spaces outside of bedroom, for work requiring device use
<> Collect devices at least one hour before bedtime
Step 3: Establish Device-free Family Times
Establish device-free family time that is convenient for your family so you can enjoy each other without the distractions of technology. Many families choose mealtimes: put the phones, tablets, and computers elsewhere during the meal, consider silencing or setting phones to “Do Not Disturb” to avoid disruptions.
Think quality time over quantity. Achieve this in the morning before school, for 15 minutes before bed or in the car. Reserve this time to connect, look into each other's eyes and listen.
<> Make the dining table a device-free zone
<> Identify other times throughout the day to reserve for device-free quality time with your child(ren) or family
Step 4: Commit to Regular Family Conversation about Technology
Growing up in the digital age is not easy. Talk with your kids about it. Remember this is not a fight; it’s an opportunity to show compassion, understand and share. Subscribe to Dr. Delaney Ruston’s Tech Talk Tuesdays and check out our conversation starters. Make this a regular, periodic practice to promote open ongoing communication about this topic.
<> Start a conversation with your family about technology. Repeat.
Step 5: Check Devices Consistently & Follow-up Accordingly
Determine a regular interval of time for checking your children’s email, text, and social media, as applicable.
What am I checking for?
The Internet and social media are not designed for children. Online content can be inappropriate and even traumatic. Look for potentially harmful, dangerous or destructive behavior. Bonus: A study found that kids changed their online behavior if they knew their parents were monitoring. When you do find something, collect yourself, keep your child’s needs at the center and approach your child with concern. Talk, listen and model appropriate behavior.
This interval may be based on their track record. For example, start with every other day for two weeks, and with no evident concerns, shift to every third day, and so on.
The frequency of checks may also be based on age. Younger kids need more frequent checks as they develop their digital citizenship and understanding. Get older teens in the habit of checking and managing their own Screen Time.
<> Review what your children are posting and seeing online at regular timepoints
<> Follow up with parenting steps appropriate to each concern
<> Seek professional help, if needed
